Benjamin says it best this week with the quote “dating is a dance, not a sprint”. But how do we dance when it feels like no one is taking the lead, and you’re both dancing to a different song? This week, Lisa and Benjamin tackle one of the biggest mistakes they see their strong and very capable women clients make – over strategizing about love and a man so much that it actually makes him turn the other way. They talk about why “getting to the bottom of things” may work for business, but not for love, and how to bring more light and fun into all aspects of calling in the Guardian of Your Soul. Lisa talks about her own experience in over-strategizing and how she got over it just in time for Benjamin to waltz in!
What You’ll Hear In This Episode:
- What does over-strategizing look like? How does it show up in ways you may not have thought about or noticed?
- Dating feels so stressful! How can I have fun and actually enjoy myself?
- How to make your texting more friendly and less urgent and needy.
- The less you strategize, the better you can weed out the avoidants and only put energy into those who match your interest and values.
- What does it feel like to a man when women over-strategize?
- Why is dating multiple people so important before deciding to go exclusive with a man?
- Yes, men can truly feel both authentic trust, safety, and friendship. AND they can feel when you are overthinking and trying to control/steer the ship.
Continue On Your Journey
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Email the podcast at: DWDpod@lisashield.com
Mentioned:
Quotes:
- “We create these stories just out of thin air, and you know, it’s crazy making.” – Benjamin
- “I think a lot of women are looking for a picture to put into a picture frame, rather than seeing the person.” – Benjamin
- “One of the concerns that a guy has in dating is that they’re going to be controlled, so their radar is up.” – Benjamin
- “It takes a lot of personal risk and a willingness to fully open yourself up to another person and to really surrender to the process.” – Lisa
- “What we found is that by combining our lives, we’ve actually gained greater autonomy and a greater sense of ourselves in doing so, because we’re reflected back by the other person. By combining our lives, we’ve actually gained.” – Benjamin
- “Dating multiple people is so important because you begin to see who shows up.” – Benjamin
- “I stopped trying to get a guy to like me. I just wanted to feel good about myself and I showed up in those situations feeling proud that I had portrayed the best example of me.” – Lisa