FREE TRAINING
FREE TRAINING

Lisa Shield

Stop THINKING About Love and Start FEELING it

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Understandably, many of us have the wrong ideas about what it takes to find love. Love isn’t particularly user-friendly. It’s not even intuitive. It’s a complex riddle in a vortex of opposing forces. Or so we THINK.

I spent decades of my life on a serious quest to find out how true and lasting love works. I literally went to caves and mountaintops and sat at the feet of gurus. But here’s what I really love to share with women like you:

It wasn’t until I made the journey deep into my own heart that I learned that the true path to love is deceptively simple.

Something that you’ll hear a lot of love coaches talk about is “techniques.” What to say, how to act, how to be in your “feminine power.” I’ll be the first to tell you that tricks of the trade are important and that your feminine energy speaks volumes.

But, there is something huge that gets stepped over there and it’s a much harder thing to achieve.

THE FIRST THING YOU HAVE TO DO IS GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD.

Of all of the women I’ve talked to over my eighteen years as a Love Coach, I can tell you that there is waaaaay too much thinking going on. When I speak to women about their love lives, they are SO up in their heads about it.

They can tell me what they think, but they can’t tell me how they feel. Some think they will deal with it later and just avoid it for now. Some think it won’t happen so they’ll just avoid it forever. Either way, they are thinking to protect them from feeling.

Here’s the irony in that: the more you avoid those feelings the more you are actually avoiding love. Here’s the first order of business in turning that around:

YOU HAVE TO GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD AND INTO YOUR HEART.

And, yeah. That’s gonna mean some feelings. Some BIG ones. You’re going to have to sit with the fact that you are alone and sad about it. You’re going to have to feel the fear that your best years are slipping away and you’re losing precious time. You’re going to have to feel the fear of spending the rest of your life alone.

When I did that in my own life, it scared the daylights out of me. I had come from a terrible 13-year marriage, was about to turn 40, and still hadn’t found the love of my life. Time was slipping by in a big way.

Feeling the pain of that allowed me to be honest with myself. My history of relationships sucked. If my past behavior was any indicator of future behavior, it was not good. I had to get honest with myself about what was at risk.

And what was at risk was really, really big.

Once you get real about feeling what you have to lose, there is no other choice but to get to work. That is the gift that getting into your heart gives to you. That is why it is so important to get out of your head and into your heart because your heart knows what to do. Your heart KNOWS how to find love, and it will TELL YOU…

BUT YOU HAVE TO ALLOW YOURSELF TO FEEL IT.

Feeling your feelings and being honest with yourself is the key to opening your heart. And opening your heart is the key to drawing love into your life.

When you get into your heart, you create a magical space for emotional nakedness to happen. And let me tell you, when you have that real, full-blown, connected, lasting emotional nakedness…

…it is the most meaningful and precious thing a soul can experience.

I say that this principle is deceptively simple, but that doesn’t mean that the journey is easy. That’s why I have put my heart and soul into creating a formula that helps women get there.

After a long and difficult journey, I found a man that exceeded my wildest dreams and is the true guardian of my soul. I want the same for every woman on the planet, minus the long and difficult part.

And so far, it’s working. I’ve lost count of the number of weddings I have been to at this point. If your heart is tingling at the reading of this post, follow this link to my free webinar. It’s 45-minutes of hopeful, illuminating goodness.

If you see yourself in that picture, book a call. There is a solution to your struggle and a loving, supportive community just on the other side of a few clicks. See? Deceptively simple.

Yours in Nakedness,

Why Me?

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Whenever I talk to a potential client, I always ask what was it about me that made her want to talk to me. 

Here are some of the real feedback I’ve received:

  • “I just love your tone of voice. I feel like I can trust you and I would feel safe opening up to you.”
  • “I watched an interview with you and your husband and couldn’t believe how he looks at you. I want to attract a man who looks at me that way.”
  • “I watched your free presentation and it really spoke to me. I related to so much of what you said.”
  • “I know I need to be more feminine, but when I try to do the things other coaches tell me to do, it feels disingenuous and like I’m playing a game. The way you say things resonates with me.”
  • “I can tell you’re authentic and you have what I’m looking for.”

This is music to my ears because these women are zeroing in on what separates me from most other love coaches. 

Truth be told, I am 59-years-old and I have been coaching in my field for nearly two decades now. You and I both know that there is no substitute for that kind of experience. In fact, I have to laugh because many of my colleagues were toddlers or teens when I first began helping women navigate online dating to find true and lasting love.

What’s more, I found my true love online, facing the same challenges you are facing today so I know what you’re going through. Yes, texting and dating apps didn’t exist back then, but almost everything else was the same.

  • I struggled to find quality men I wanted to date online.
  • I didn’t know what to write in my profile.
  • I wasn’t sure what pictures to post.
  • I didn’t know how to keep a conversation going over email or how to get a man to ask me out on a date.

But there were also deeper issues that were stopping me from opening up and getting vulnerable with men. I didn’t know how much was too much to say to a man on a first date. I didn’t know how to talk about the important things like did he want kids and was he looking for something long-term. And I didn’t know how to express my needs without seeming needy or insecure.

When I found true love, there were no love coaches. That’s why I became one of the first coaches in my field to help women accomplish what, for me, had been the hardest obstacle I’d ever had to overcome. 

When I started dating online, I wasn’t naive. I knew that I was the common denominator in all my failed relationships and that I still had a lot to learn if I was going to attract the kind of man and create the kind of relationship with him that I wanted. I knew it wasn’t going to happen “just because I was such a great catch and I deserved to be loved.” I wasn’t some starlet from the 1950’s waiting to be discovered by the right man. I was a woman who had a lot to learn about men.

If you are ready for the best, proven, step-by-step approach there is to find real love and you want to work with one of the most seasoned love coaches out there, a coach who will prove to you that you don’t have to compromise and you can have it all, then click here and watch my free 45-minute presentation to see how I can help you find The Guardian of YOUR soul now!

Nakedly yours,

The REAL Reason You’re Still Single

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Every day I talk to women over Zoom about what’s not working in their love lives right now. They will tell me things like:

  • I can’t meet quality men on my level who I want to date.
  • Men lose interest and keep ghosting me.
  • Online dating sites just don’t work for me.
  • I get dates but all of the men have commitment issues.
  • All of the men I meet just want sex.

I get it. Dating today is nothing if not challenging. But none of these things are the real reason why you and the other women I speak with are single.

When I dig into their pasts, I find a history of failed relationships or no relationships at all.

That is the REAL issue.

If you haven’t had a truly successful, loving, co-committed relationship in your life, this is the issue you need to be addressing.

We are all the sum total of the choices we make in life. Even if men pursued you, you said yes to them. And you chose to stay in relationships with them, even when you knew you should leave.

The key to successful dating is to own your part in why your past relationships failed. If you don’t do this work first, the chances of you being able to choose a good man and create a loving, lasting relationship are slim to none. Instead, you will waste more of your precious life, repeating the same painful patterns, and expecting a different result.

If you keep repeating these patterns and having more failed relationships, your trust and abandonment issues will continue to grow. That wall around your heart will become so high that no man will be able to get past it even if he wanted to. Is this really what you want to keep doing?

I was with my ex-husband for a total of 13 years. I thought about leaving him for years. In fact, I did leave him after we were together for five years and then I went back. These were my choices and the only way I could ever find true love was by taking responsibility for why I made them.

I never felt attractive to men and I got little male attention when I was younger. So, I stayed with my ex-husband because I was scared that, if I left him, I would be alone for the rest of my life.

There were things I needed to work on to raise my self-esteem, but what I realized was that, more than anything, I didn’t understand men.

I didn’t know what they wanted or needed from me other than sex.

I didn’t know how to speak to men and ask for what I wanted from them without sounding desperate, needy, angry, or insecure.

I didn’t know how to be playful and light with men.

And most of all, I didn’t know how to let down my guard and get emotionally naked so I could create a deep and lasting romantic connection with a man.

I know you dream of having an epic love with a fabulous man, and you CAN HAVE IT! Let me show you how.

For the last eighteen years, I have been with my husband, Benjamin, in the most beautiful relationship I have ever seen. He is The Guardian of my Soul. I found him because I did the right work on myself to learn how to become the kind of woman a man like Benjamin would fall in love with.

Are sick and tired of blaming the dating sites, men, or the powers that be for why you’re single? Do you want to gain real power and control over your dating life so you can attract the Guardian of Your Soul? If so, then click this link to my FREE 45-minute presentation, and let’s get you your dream!

Yours nakedly,

Hate Online Dating? Please read this!

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As the pandemic drones on and most of us are still quarantining or social distancing to some degree or other, our reliance on the apps and online dating sites is higher than ever.

I know this isn’t what many of you want to hear but, right now, this is the only way my clients are getting dates.

We don’t know how long the pandemic is going to last, but we do know that being single and alone during COVID isn’t fun. 

What you REALLY want is to be snuggling on the couch with your sweetheart, sharing a bottle of wine, and dreaming about what you are going to create together with this magical life you’ve been given. 

If you’re like many women, COVID has been the wake-up call you’ve needed to get your butt in gear and do something about finding your guy. It’s forced you to stop distracting yourself with work, girlfriends, and family and see that you have to make dating and finding love a priority. 

But how to get dates?

I know if you follow me, you are one smart cookie. (I just Googled that phrase to see where it came from!) You know that you didn’t get to where you are in life because it was handed to you on a silver platter. 

No successful, attractive, intelligent, put-together woman wants to date online. That’s a fact. But sometimes we have to put our big girl panties on and, as the Nike ads say, “Just do it!”

So here’s the GREAT news! Even if you’ve tried online dating in the past and it “didn’t work for you,” that doesn’t mean it can’t work for you now. 

Nearly every woman I coach told me when we first started working together that she hates online dating and that it doesn’t work for her.

Here’s what I said to these women: “If it has worked for millions of people (including me), it can work for you too. You just need to learn the right way to do it.  I don’t care if hundreds of men told you they loved your profile and pictures, if you weren’t attracting the right men, it doesn’t matter what they told you.”

There is so much more to dating successfully online than you could ever imagine. And if you don’t know how to do it right, you are throwing away the most precious thing you have: your time.

Let me lay this out for you, so you can really understand what I am saying. 

Einstein said, “You can’t solve a problem with the same mind that created the problem.” 

So, the first step in successfully dating online is to change your mindset about dating. 

This means that you have to truly understand the mistakes YOU’VE been making and you must have clarity on how to make different choices going forward.

To do that, I have my clients take a one-month dating hiatus so they can gain a new perspective on how the dating process really works. During this month, they take a very serious and deep look at all of their past relationships and the mistakes they have been making. Then, I help them get clear on what they must look for in their life partner.  

Next, I guide them on what photos they need. As a former professional fashion photographer, this is something I know a thing or two about! 😉 

Finally, they write their profiles according to my format and then my husband, Benjamin, rewrites their profiles for them from the perspective of a quality man. These profiles are worth their weight in gold! 

By the time they get back out into the dating world, my clients are actually excited to date and they are astounded by the responses they get from men!

Don’t believe me? Then hear it from them…

(These are just five out of the hundreds of messages from my clients about the difference their profiles make. ) 

Can you just hire Benjamin to write your profile? Nope.

You and I both know that this is just one essential part of a bigger process. Let’s just say that, if you only got a new profile, it would be like choosing to only reading one of the required books for your Master’s degree program.

If you want to learn how to date during the pandemic and find true love for the rest of your life, then watch my FREE 45-minute presentation. If you fit the criteria, let’s jump on a call right away so I can show you how to conquer the online dating world and change your love life forever!

Nakedly yours,

HOW YOU BECOME BEAUTIFUL

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I’ve done a lot of looking into mirrors in my life. Some of it primping, getting ready to go out. Eyebrow plucking, makeup, hair, outfit, I’ve put in some hours. And that’s just the practical mirror time.

Then there’s the other hours. The hours spent trying to figure out who that person looking back at me is. Not liking what I see. Judging and shaming the face, the hair, the body and wondering how it could ever be fixed.

That’s been the bulk of my mirror time.

Which is why the event I am about to describe is so extraordinary.

A few days ago, I was walking by the mirror on my way to make a video in my garden. I caught a glimpse of myself and thought, “Oh my goodness, who is that beautiful woman staring back at me?”

When I was much younger, I didn’t feel pretty. Not as a little girl, a young woman or, really, for the first 34 years of my life. And it wasn’t just that I didn’t feel beautiful, which I didn’t. I hated myself. I hated the way I looked. I was overweight and unhappy and I stayed that way for thirty-four years. 

It didn’t help that my mother and grandmother were always commenting on my weight, saying things like, “You would be so pretty if you just lost twenty pounds.”

Being overweight was one way that my feelings about myself showed on the outside. The other was in my romantic relationships. I fantasized about the kind of man I wanted, the kind of man I thought I deserved, but I down deep, I didn’t believe that man would want me. 

Because I didn’t feel attractive, I wound up settling for a man who wasn’t handsome by any stretch of the imagination. At least he was funny and creative, and I told myself that was enough for me.

It turned out that he was also a pathological liar. Even though I knew things weren’t good, I married him and wound up investing a total of thirteen years of my life in that relationship. 

When I came out of my first marriage, I had a stunning realization. I knew I had to look at why, out of all the men on the planet, I had picked my ex and why I had chosen to stay with him for thirteen years. 

No one forced me to do these things. They were my choices and, now, I had the opportunity to choose differently. I was determined to get it right this time.

I knew there were no quick diets or Band-Aid fixes that would solve my problems. It was time to do the deeper work to learn to love and accept myself. 

The most important choice I ever made was to face my weight issue head-on. I was smart enough to know that no diet would solve this problem for me. I’d taken weight off many times only to put more weight back on. And even when I was thinner, I still didn’t like myself. 

I knew that “it wasn’t what I was eating, it was what was eating me” that mattered…and, this time, I was determined to get to the bottom of it.

To do that, I sought out the greatest mentors and teachers I could find. I studied with the author of The Four Agreements, Don Miguel Ruiz. I got my Master’s degree in Spiritual Psychology at a fabulous alternative university in Santa Monica, CA. And I joined a very strict 12-Step group for compulsive eating. 

In doing this work, it became clear to me how I had been hiding behind my weight and compromising myself my entire life.

I spent the next six years working on me before I felt that I was ready to find my true partner. By the time I started to date, I didn’t just feel like a new woman, I was a new woman.

Now, when I look at my handsome, kind, loving husband of eighteen years, I know that I would never have been able to receive his love if I hadn’t done this work on myself. 

Benjamin tells me all the time that I am the most beautiful woman he knows and that I turn him on more than anyone ever has. Every time we dress to go out (before the pandemic, that is), he always comments on how pretty I look. 

There was a time when I wouldn’t have believed it if a man said these things to me, but now I do. 

You see, Benjamin is my mirror. 

The me that I see reflected back to me in his eyes is who I now believe myself to be. And the more he reflects back to me who I am, the more of myself I become.

That is how I have come to embrace my own beauty and to love the woman I see in the mirror today. 

Feeling seen and loved by my husband who I respect and adore with every cell in my being has given me the confidence not only to embrace my own beauty but to let it shine from the inside out for all the world to see.  

All my life I longed for anyone to tell me I was beautiful. My mother didn’t do that for me. My grandmother didn’t do that for me. And my father certainly didn’t do that for me. 

It takes more than a diet or a self-help book or saying affirmations in the mirror to become a woman who can attract The Guardian of Your Soul. It takes personal responsibility and deep personal work. 

But once you do this work on yourself, you will be ready attract and receive the love of an AMAZING man. I can tell you from personal experience, it’s the most empowering and freeing thing you could ever do!

The hitch is that it is really hard to do this work on your own. I certainly didn’t. I needed the help of great teachers to get to where I am today.

If you are ready to make some real and lasting changes and finally draw the right man into your life, my free 45-minute webinar is a great place to start. 

If you like what you hear in it, book a call with me and let me tell you how to get on the other side of this and into the arms of your soulmate.

Your in Nakedness,

Choosing Your Emotional Home

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I wanted to share with you something one of my friends recently said. She was talking about choosing your emotional home. You get to choose where you want to live emotionally in the same way you choose where you live physically.  You can choose if you live in a state of happiness, joy, or misery just like you get to choose if you live in a house, an apartment, or at home with your parents. 

In case you haven’t noticed, we are right in the midst of one of the most extraordinary times in history… a real-life pandemic. In a matter of days our lives were completely turned upside down. 

This time has been especially challenging for those of you who are single. I’ve been talking to many of you, and I know that you’re really struggling. You are feeling your singleness in a way you’ve never felt it before.

For many of you, the quarantine has been a huge wake-up call. The great thing about wake up calls is that they show you that you’re at a crossroads. You’re standing in a moment where you can make a choice. You get to choose how you feel about being single and what you want to do about it. 

You get to decide whether you want to sink into despair or if you are going to be motivated to finally take your love life seriously so you don’t wind up single and alone at the end of your life. 

In the last few weeks the price of lumber has skyrocketed due to massive home remodels. People are putting their energy into renovating their homes because they know they’re going to be spending a lot more time in them. 

You have the choice to do the same with your emotional home. 

You can either hide in the basement…

… or you can bedazzle the sh*t out of it.

You can take this time to let yourself feel every one of those feelings. Unpack them all and spread them out so that you can really see them. Make a pile of the ones that serve you. Then, open the doors and windows and sweep the rest into the sunlight.

You can get on the apps and explore what’s out there. Talk to men on Zoom and get curious about them. Enjoy listening to their stories and relish the sheer beauty of human connection. 

You can choose to see virtual dating as a godsend, a golden opportunity to connect on a deeper level without having to worry about sleeping with someone too soon. You can see it as a chance to plant the seeds for the relationship you want to see growing in the spring.

Most importantly, you can choose to get help. No matter how bored and frustrated you are right now, I doubt any of you would attempt to do a serious home renovation on your own. You aren’t going to start ripping down walls and tearing up floors on your own…although that could be a good way to get your aggressions out.

In the same way, if you really want to come out the other end of this pandemic a changed woman with a love life, you can hire a Love Coach to help you make a step-by-step plan to help you get there. It’s your choice.

If you haven’t seen my 45-minute webinar, it’s a great place to start. If you like what you hear in it, book a call with me now and let’s get going.

In the meantime, make your emotional home one that you want to live in. You’re going to be in it for awhile.

Yours in Nakedness,

Filling the Void – Is Covid a Wake-Up Call??

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In case you haven’t noticed, we are right in the midst of one of the most extraordinary times in history… a real-life pandemic. In a matter of days our lives were completely turned upside down. 

This time has been especially challenging for those of you who are single. I’ve been talking to many of you, and I know that you’re really struggling. You are feeling your singleness in away you’ve never felt it before.

For many of you, the quarantine has been a huge wake-up call. The great thing about wake up calls is that they show you that you’re at a crossroads. You’re standing in a moment where you can to make a choice. You get to choose how you feel about being single and what you want to do about it. 

You get to decide whether you want to sink into despair or if you are going to be motivated to finally take your love life seriously so you don’t wind up single and alone at the end of your life. 

In the last few weeks the price of lumber has skyrocketed due to massive home remodels. People are putting their energy into renovating their homes because they know they’re going to be spending a lot more time in them. 

You have the choice to do the same with your emotional home. 

You can either hide the basement…

… or you can bedazzle the sh*t out of it.

You can take this time to let yourself feel every one of those feelings. Unpack them all and spread them out so that you can really see them. Make a pile of the ones that serve you. Then open the doors and windows and sweep the rest into the sunlight.

You can get on the apps and explore what’s out there. Talk to men on Zoom and get curious about them. Enjoy listening to their stories and relish the sheer beauty of human connection. 

You can choose to see virtual dating is a godsend, a golden opportunity to connect on a deeper level without having to worry about sleeping with someone too soon. You can see it as a chance to plant the seeds for the relationship you want to see growing in the spring.

Most importantly, you can choose to get help. No matter how bored and frustrated you are right now, I doubt any of you would attempt to do a serious home renovation on your own. You aren’t going to start ripping down walls and tearing up floors on your own…although that could be a good way to get your aggressions out.

In  the same way, if you really want to come out the other end of this pandemic a changed woman with a love life, you can hire a Love Coach to help you make a step-by-step plan to help you get there. It’s your choice.

If you haven’t seen my 45- minute webinar, it’s a great place to start. If you like what you hear in it, book a call with me now and let’s get going.

In the meantime, make your emotional home one that you want to live in. You’re going to be in it for awhile.

Yours in Nakedness,

The Do’s and Don’ts of Virtual Dating

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We all know that dating can be frustrating, exhausting, and depressing…and now we get to add a global pandemic and quarantining to the mix!

If you weren’t ready to give up on love before, you probably are now.

I am here to tell you not to panic during the pandemic.

Every change in life offers us new opportunities, if we choose to look for them.

Over the past few months, almost all of my clients have quickly and easily made the shift to video dating…and many of them LOVE it!

They are telling me that talking on the phone and doing video chats allows them to vet the men they are considering dating without having to leave the comfort of their own home.

Many of the men they would have dressed up and gone out to meet pre-COVID, are now quickly screened and sent on their merry way, saving my clients precious time and trouble.

Like most things we do in life, there is a bit of a learning curve when switching to phone and video chats, but it isn’t as difficult as some of you are making it.

Here are a few essential tips to make sure you get the most out of the experience and know what you need to avoid.

1. DO IT

The first do is DO. DO go on virtual dates. Don’t hate on the medium, it’s what we’ve got right now, and it’s a brilliant opportunity. Don’t worry about how you look on camera or whether you’ll seem awkward. Those are technical fixes that I’ll address in a minute.

Make a commitment to yourself to let go of your prejudices and give it a try.

Seize this opportunity. You might be surprised at how much fun you have. And it will be a great way to do something constructive to fill your time and get some human interaction so you don’t feel so isolated during the quarantine.

2. LEARN THE TECHNOLOGY

Zoom can be a little tricky the first time you use it. If you are having challenges, you can Google things like “How do I get my sound to work on Zoom?” or, “How do I turn my camera on?” Zoom provides short video tutorials on almost every challenge you face.

Zoom also allows meetings to be recorded. You can see in the corner of your screen if that’s happening. If you are in another person’s Zoom room, they will need to turn it off.

There are other colossal mistakes people make when video chatting. Check out this Bored Panda article for a few good laughs. https://www.boredpanda.com/funny-video-meetings-conference-call-fails-quarantine

There are also functional differences between the desktop versions and the app versions of Zoom, and you’ll want to understand those.

Again, a quick tutorial video on whatever you’re using should be easy to find on YouTube.

3. GLAM YOUR CAM

While webcams and built-in cameras can be unforgiving, you can still look amazing with a few simple adjustments.

Most importantly, you want to have a good camera angle and good light. Try to arrange your camera so that it is eye-level or higher. If you are using a laptop or an iPad, just slip a few thick books underneath to bring the camera to eye level.

The best way to get consistently good lighting is to invest in a ring light. They are easy to find and not too expensive. You can find one on Amazon for about $10.00.

Just clip it to the top of your screen and… boom! Instant beauty lights every time.

4. GO WITH THE FLOW

Remember, this is the perfect opportunity to take…your…time. This is a chance to slow everything down and really get to know someone.

Let it evolve. Ask about him. Respect the fact that you have a captive audience and resist the urge to tell him your entire life story.

Try not to put expectations on how much or how often you will talk. Remember, this is an anxious time that is bringing up heavy emotions and situations for people. Everyone needs to be able to deal with it in their own way.

You want to be able to communicate clearly and create the space for him to do so. If you sense that he’s not present with you or fading in the conversation, offer space.

Say, “It’s fine if we just make this quick. We can pick it up later.”

If he stops texting you or fluctuates between reaching out and withdrawing, don’t make up stories about why.

Now more than ever, it’s important not to take things personally. Just communicate. This is the perfect opportunity to start stepping into your voice. It’s ALL GOOD, so let what happens happen!

5. SEE THE BIG PICTURE

Yes, there is a learning curve involved in virtual dating. And yes, the situation will require you to grow some new muscles in your communication.

Now is the time to create emotionally naked connections. You’ve wanted this opportunity to talk and get to know someone without jumping right into sex.

This is that opportunity.

If you can let go and enjoy it, be curious and learn how to really enjoy getting to know and appreciate men, that’s when a whole new world will open up for you.

You will then be in a place to go back into the world of hugs and handshakes and truly date with an open heart.

And when your heart opens, I guarantee you, all the love that you desire will appear.

Don’t let COVID become another excuse to put off your search for love. So many of my successful female clients are taking advantage of fact that, for the first time, they aren’t buried in work or distracting themselves with social opportunities. They’re facing the fact that they are alone and without a partner…and they’re doing something about it.

I’d love to tell you how I can help you stop doing what’s not working and start doing what will.

Most of the women I work with find true love within 3 to 12 months.It’s a difficult thing to do on your own, and even more so right now. I want to help you breakthrough and make a plan to have love waiting for you at the end of this tunnel.

I have a free 45-minute webinar for you that will change your life. Watch it now, and if you like what you hear, book a complimentary breakthrough call with me here. 

I’d love to tell you how I can help you stop doing what’s not working and start doing what will.

In the meantime, stay healthy and date on!

Yours in Nakedness,

WHY YOU ARE ALREADY BRILLIANT AT VIRTUAL DATING And How it can Work to Your Advantage

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Covid-19 has put a giant damper on everyone’s social life, but that does not mean you have to stop dating.

At a time when we are having to stay away from each other, sew our own face masks, and scour the earth for toilet paper, to continue your search for your soulmate, you are going to have to adapt to a new way of connecting with men.

That means hiking up those sweatpants, dusting off your profile, and downloading the video platform of your choice so you can start going on virtual dates.

Many of you will feel resistant to trying this. You don’t like how you look on camera. You don’t want anyone to see where you live. You feel strange having to sit and stare at some stranger on a screen. You come across so much better in person. You feel even stranger having to sit and stare at yourself on screen for long periods at a time.

Not only that, why FaceTime when you can say everything you need to say in a 3-word text?

You can make all the excuses in the world, but you don’t have to let Covid-19 stop you from going for your dream. You can embrace virtual dating and start to see it as an opportunity.

Start thinking of Zoom, Skype, WhatsApp, and FaceTime as the Starbucks of today. Pour yourself a cup and hop online for a virtual “coffee date.”

Here’s where this gets exciting! If you aren’t just trying to fill your time and you are taking your virtual dates seriously, this is a golden opportunity to practice connecting in a new and more emotionally naked way with men. You have a chance to focus on sharing your head before you jump into bed.

I was on a call last week with my private women’s coaching group and I reflected on how we forget that, in our grandmother’s generation, almost no one had sex before marriage. Men courted women and we took time to get to know one another.

According to a Time Magazine survey, until a month ago, on average people were having sex after 3.68 dates. That’s the AVERAGE! Our modern-day hookup culture has made it far too easy to have a couple of drinks on a date, cave in to chemistry, and wind up in bed together.

Virtual dating requires you to connect through language rather than sex. Here we are with nothing to do but sit and talk to one another. Take advantage of it!

You still might be compelled to meet with someone you have connected with in person. I advise my clients not to take the risk, partly because they might catch the virus but also because there is a lot they can learn about themselves by taking advantage of this time. I tell them to slow down and practice getting men to open up and be more vulnerable with them.

I frequently hear women complain that the men they meet are all emotionally unavailable. Many men are looking for the kind of woman who make it feel safe for them to open up. Being a soft, safe space for a man to share his innermost thoughts and feelings doesn’t come naturally to many women. Men complain that we can be needy, desperate, critical, or like mothers.

Although some men are excellent verbal communicators, this is by and large women’s territory. Verbal communication is our area of expertise.

There’s an evolutionary explanation for why that is.

As early humans, men were providers and protectors. There was plenty of bonding going on, but it was mostly nonverbal. When they were hunting with other members of their tribe, they needed to focus, stay quiet, and be ready for action.

The last thing they were doing was talking about their feelings.

Women, on the other hand, were hanging out with each other, cooking, tending to the children, and talking…A LOT!

So through our evolutionary role as nurturers, we developed the gift of verbal communication. And this is our gift to men.

Virtual dating is the perfect opportunity to use this power.

Verbal communication is how we share our real selves. It’s how we share our heads and our hearts.

I believe the secret to finding true and lasting love is to learn to get emotionally naked. And that means being able to connect emotionally before you jump into bed.

I believe that a woman’s greatest desire is to have a man get emotionally naked with her. This is what most women dream of.

We want to connect deeply, safely, and emotionally with a man we are really attracted to. A man who we feel is really attracted to us. And that can open up to a physical connection, but we want a man to want to get emotionally naked with us.

And in order to do that, we have to become the kind of woman that a man would feel safe getting emotionally naked with.

Virtual dating is a perfect environment for being able to do this. It isn’t something that is going to happen on a few dates, but when you take things slow he may be able to get emotionally naked with you.

Emotional nakedness means opening up your heart in a way that takes some serious inner work for most people. It can be really difficult to do on your own.

If you’re interested in going deeper and finally getting real results, I can help.

In my 45-minute webinar I have some information that will change your life. Watch it here if you haven’t already.

If you like what you hear, let’s jump on a call and I will tell you how I can help you get off the dating treadmill and find the one. My clients find love, get married, have babies within 3 months to a year.

That could also be you!

You can also join my Facebook Group Dating Without Drama, and join the conversation.

Be well, be safe, and get yourself on that webcam. You can even keep the sweats on. He’ll never know.

I look forward to connecting with you!

Love,

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© Lisa Shield – Two Shields on a Shingle, Inc 



 

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